Soccer Legs

Before I packed up and moved to NY, I had the most fantastic job ever. I worked as a MA in a doctors office, just like I do now, but my office was the best. It was small - 2 doctors and 1 PA - and all 3 of the providers were absolutely committed to teaching. Which was perfect for me and my future hopes and dreams. I could spend 20 minutes asking Dr Whitely questions and she wouldn't just humor me - she'd enjoy it. I miss that job.

The office manager has a 16 year old daughter who plays soccer. In fact, at my interview we spent 30 minutes talking soccer - coaches, teams, etc - and I'm halfway convinced that's why I was hired in the first place.

As we all know, that wonderful change of life can hit right around 16. For this girl, she was right in the middle of it. For an athlete, that can mean a lot of different things. For soccer players, it means soccer thighs. For me it all started around 16 - I think its awful that kids start weight training right in the middle of puberty. First I've got tiny bumps on my chest and now you want me to squat 100lbs? Everything on your body is going in every which way: boobs out, hips out, abs in, and it can be a bit overwhelming. Trust me.

One of the not-so-pleasant side effects of weight training is stretch marks. For me and my fellow soccer players, this devastates your upper thighs, right around the hips. I have some nasty scarring all over the front half of me - though, for the record, as my legs are shrinking so are my scars! YAY!

Back to my office manager and her daughter. The OM was really concerned about her daughter. To the point that one day she called me back into her office to ask me about it. I assured her that some stretch marks on the thighs were totally normal, not to worry, and I had lots. I even went so far as to tell her that I would show her mine, if she wanted to see. And although I was joking, she asked if she could. So, what did I do?

I closed the door and dropped my pants. In front of my boss.

How many people have pulled this off without getting fired? I'm sure that I'm in the minority here. In the end, though, I made this poor woman feel a little bit better about her daughter and given that outcome, I'm totally at peace with my shamelessness.